If you are seeking to be all that God would desire of you while you are alive, then you will have to come to an understanding that warfare is certain. Many times though, and in our darkest hours, we tend to shrink back from the one place we need to go to in order to be set free from this type of encounter with the dark forces —the cross. There will always be trials and tribulations which must be endured along our specific path in life. At times, it can feel as though your very being is caught between two clamps with the screw tightening with each passing moment. This is warfare. It is not the time to give up and quit, but a clear indication to you that the time has come to press through keeping a stiff upper lip. Life is not easy by any shape of the imagination. Your level of warfare will depend on how close you actually come to the cross and your divine destiny. Take heart for you are not alone. These particular types of feelings have been experienced by many icons of our faith throughout the centuries. But know this; the fourth man is always in the fire with you (Dan. 3: 1-28).
I am trying to encourage you to weather whatever is plaguing you at the moment. Now is not the time to give up, shrink back from responsibilities, or quit. Rejoice that you are experiencing this type of warfare, for it means that something is going right, there is a breakthrough up ahead, or this is being allowed to mature you into the individual that God desires of you. If you knew the gift that God longs to give to each of you, you would run to the cross for His help. Our inheritance as a child of God is more than attending a church service on any given Sunday. What God longs for in us is a full on relationship where He is glorified by the life you live, which ultimately will stand as a testimony to others (who do watch) that He is real.
I have walked through years of warfare in varying degrees, and I can tell you with certainty that you will come through (even if your crawl the last quarter mile!) with a greater knowledge of how much God does love you. You might cry, get mad or angry, but you will come out the winner if you don’t give up and continually stay at the feet of the only one who can turn the problem around.
In my home I have a specific spot where I kneel before the LORD God to pray. It is considered my altar and place where I commune with Him. I would strongly suggest that you find a place such as this in your home and use it specifically as the place where you go and talk to God Almighty. Write down (it does not have to be fancy) what is driving you crazy at the moment and then LEAVE it with Him. Ask Him to deliver you from rotten feelings, the unforgiveness of anyone, or any concerns you have. Get up, believe that God has heard you and watch and wait for Him to speak to you. Most of the time, He will not actually speak (eventhough He most certainly can) but there will be something or someone who gives you an answer to your specific situation. It is possible to hear your answer from the television or radio. God speaks to us in the way He knows we receive and process because He designed us. Do not box Him in.
Consider the things which I have said to you. Please know that not one time in the past twenty years, has the Holy Spirit (God’s agent in this earth) not given me direction of some nature. The answers were not always what I wanted, but I came to understand each and every divine move was what I needed for the moment. Allow Him to do more for you in this life in order that you can become all He desires for you.